Albie’s Edit

Albie’s Little List of Big Slays

Greetings, peasants. Your favorite tiny king here — bark once if you’re already obsessed with me (I know you are).

It’s me, Albie. I heard my mom called me the It Girl Edit’s new intern. Yeah right. I’m the boss around here. I’m an actual service dog in training (eghem, all you fake losers better watch it). I’m also your style icon, your fluff lord, and bigger menace to society than my mom. You might’ve seen me trotting around the West Village like I own the block (because I do), or peeing on my mom’s Birkin outside Sant Ambroeus (because I also do that).

Today, I'm taking over Mom’s Substack to give you a highly curated peek into my supplies, toys, treats, and general tiny king-ness. Whether you’re a fellow pampered pooch or a lowly human trying to impress your fur child, this guide is for you.

We're talking:

• Beds softer than your ex's spine

• Playpens that double as VIP lounges (no peasants allowed)

• Crates with better amenities than most NYC apartments

• And a leash that tells the world "vet bills are the least expensive thing about me"

So buckle up. The Albie Era has begun. And yes, I am accepting treats in exchange for product recs.

Welcome to the fluff files.

xoxo,
Albie
aka Tiny King of The It Girl Edit

---

🛏️ Beds, Crates & Cozy Sh*t

Where I go to ignore you. A selection of nap stations that meet my standards and aesthetic.

• Crate Sometimes I go in here to escape the crushing weight of being perceived.

• Playpen My penthouse suite. Only VIPs (me) allowed inside. (Mom got a flimsy, tragic one at first — don’t worry, she came to her senses real quick. I deserve the best, obviously.

• Bed It’s giving cozy. I will be accepting all snacks in bed from now on. Mom been got a second one for the upstate house.

• Blanket If I am not swaddled like a delicate burrito at all times, we have a problem. These are for nesting, napping, and dramatic sighing.

• Pee Pads Mind your business while I do mine.

🍽️ My Michelin Star Tasting Menu

Bone appétit, losers

• Dry Food Mom says I won’t be on this for long. We don’t do kibble or preservatives (gasp) in this household.

• Farmer’s Dog Clean ingredients, shiny coat, strong poops — you know, the essentials. My body is a temple and Mom says beauty comes from within… so obviously I eat like a wellness influencer with a trust fund.

• Bone Broth I like this mixed in with my dry food for a more enjoyable mouth feel

• Wet Food I only eat this when it’s frozen into my pacifier. It’s my go-to bedtime snack and keeps me from yapping when Mom has important calls about my modeling career. Professionalism? I invented it.